Today I am wondering what to write about.
I have no drama in my life at this moment, so I am wondering what I have to say.
I decided to write about manufacturing drama. It is something I did for much of my life.
When there was nothing happening or nothing “wrong”, I would go looking for something to “FIX” about me or you.
I was uncomfortable when I felt content and like nothing was stirred up.
I didn’t really know how to function in the space of NO DRAMA!
I’m certain you know people like this or possibly you’ve done this too.
Maybe you didn’t even know you were doing it or why you were doing it.
When I was manufacturing problems, it was because I felt broken and there was ALWAYS something to fix about me.
If there was nothing I would search inside, if I found nothing, I made something up.
The result was I lived in a state of chaos, drama/trauma. I thrived on the stress of drama.
It is an endless, non-productive cycle that left me in a state of living on adrenaline.
When I would stop, I would crash and burn from pure exhaustion.
This is what I’ve learned:
I was not comfortable with nothing to fix.
I was addicted to the drama and the chemical reaction it produced in my body .
When it wasn’t my own drama happening and I stopped making my own problems, I would focus on someone else’s seeming problem. (Basically, I would sit in judgement and gossip about how they needed to behave.)
I was not okay being okay.
Feeling content was not a normal state for me.
As I got comfortable being with myself, I stopped manufacturing problems for the sake of keeping the drama alive.
When I stopped manufacturing problems, I got to refocus on living my purpose and delivering my message here in this life.
I get to focus on writing and creating a business that is an expression of who I am.
I get to coach and mentor people on their journey into loving themselves from the inside out.
I get to be HAPPY WITH WHO I AM TODAY.
Feel free to reach out and contact me, I would love to coach you on your journey.
How do you relate to this topic?
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