My name is Marti Forrest.
This is my personal story of how I went from living in self-loathing, having a broken boyfriend picker and being a low-bottom human being status to having a life beyond my wildest dreams (which, BTW, used to be based on fairy tales).
This includes being married to my best friend and being animal lovers, we live with 4 cats and a dog. I am a solo-preneur that has a voice today and I use it to stand up and speak for the underdog. I whole-heartedly advocate for people living their best self into the world through this mentor coaching I do.
Whew! I just said all that out loud, well, written and on my website, for anyone to see, including my family.
What I KNOW is if I can do this work, as stubborn, narrow-minded and hard-headed as I’ve been, so can you.
Before I get to meat of my story….
3 things I’d like you to know about me…
- I am an advocate for what you say you want and I will take a stand for you to have your dreams.
- I love you enough to risk telling the truth, especially, if I think it will be helpful on our journey together.
- I continue offering tips and tools to be successful in your expansion, growth and healing, even if I’m not getting paid for it.
A LITTLE ABOUT ME….
I came into this life with a disease. Nobody knew I had this disease.
I didn’t know I had this disease either. I thought this is how life is:
- Life is difficult.
- I am here to please others.
- I am alive to prove I am worthy to take up space on this planet.
Everything and anything that gave me my worth was sought out externally.
I gave you the power to determine my worth and didn’t even know it.
I grew up in a middle-income home and by all looks and appearances a “normal” family, but, I am here to tell you I was uncomfortable in my own skin from the time I came into this world.
My parents were committed, hard-working people that provided for the family.
I was well-mannered and well-behaved as a child, because I was terrified to step out of line, lest I get “the look”.
My life was about looking good to the outside world. I wanted to be liked by everyone and I would pretelize myself to make that happen. As a result, people loved being around me, because I was so proper and everything was stuffed deep inside.
By today’s qualification and definition, my family would probably be considered dysfunctional.
Remember, I said I was born with a disease.
What I mean by this is: DIS-EASE
I was ill at ease with this world, life and being human. As a result, I was pissed off for a long time about being here taking up space I did not feel worthy of.
In my young years, I escaped in books. I’ve been a book lover from the time I could read. I excelled and it served me well for my adventures in my head where I was always the heroine. I didn’t feel successful in my family, so my fantasy of books allowed me to be someone’s hero.
At the tender age of 14 I discovered alcohol. This became my solution for the next 13 years, until it stopped working.
In the mix of this 13 year period I did just about anything that kept me from feeling:
Relationships, alcohol, drugs, drama/chaos, money/work, sex….
It all worked, or so I thought, until it didn’t.
Suicide was not an option, but I wanted to die and leading to this point, I did many things (I don’t remember most of them) that would potentially take me out. When I hit bottom, I was certain if you knew who I was on the inside, you’d loathe me as much as I did.
The gift of desperation and pain was my turning point.
I got clean and sober in 1994. I was 27 years old.
My boyfriend, later husband, introduced me to recovery. I married him at 28, he went into the military, I moved to the East Coast to be with him, got pregnant and miscarried, came back to California and got a divorce.
I married him, because I thought it was a good idea and my biological clock was ticking frantically. Oh yeah, I was also certain he had the potential to be fixed by me.
We loved each other, for our interpretation of love, but we were toxic together. We did not like ourselves, there was no way it was ever going to be a healthy marriage when we didn’t like each other either. It was not about whether we loved each other, we were not good for each other. When we realized this, we divorced.
This was just one of the string of men I used my broken picker to find. I was going to fix another one, because I’d been so successful thus far.
It felt important to begin there, so you know that I know how it is to never feel good enough and then wonder why and how I kept repeating the same kind of relationships over and over and over…
I was a victim of my life and I had no idea how to be any different than this. I lived and thrived in the insanity. Recovery was just the beginning of the way out.
Much more of the transformative work came from seminars and workshops. I spent 1000’s of dollars searching for the answer. I’ve been called a seeker by many, but, I’m here to tell you this journey has felt long and arduous.
I was searching and searching, convinced there was a magical key that would unlock the gifts I knew lived inside me. I was certain if I found the key I would be healed and, in my mind, I would have reached “perfection”.
I did not understand ALL those seminars and workshops were part of the journey, part of the seeking and, ultimately, peeling the layers of healing.
At some point, I realized there was not one magical key.
The journey is the KEY. The magic is the willingness. Willingness is the key that unlocks the journey into the fire.
I have found no shortcuts or way around. The only way to the other side of the fire is through it.
Somehow, I’ve walked through the fire and learned to use it to fuel my passion rather that becoming consumed by it.
A number of years into my recovery, I married again. This one was toxic in a different way. I found him to be the external expression of my internal anger and rage.
I’d been angry my whole life and didn’t even know it. He was a catalyst for me to peel many deep layers of the anger and heal it. I stopped being angry at the core of my being and can have the emotion of anger today.
Both of my 1st marriages were short term; less than 5 years, I think.
THE NEXT STEPS…
Finally, in 2008 I went through the Quantum Success Coaching Academy and promptly did nothing with it, except add more knowledge and experience to my tool box.
In 2015, I completed the Relationship Coaching Institute. This time I actually took the action to hire a business coach to mentor me in creating the business side of coaching.
Truth be told, I have coached 1000’s of people through my life experiences and school of hard knocks. I say this, because I have been a licensed hairstylist since 1986, feeding my people pleasing skills too.
In 1998, I became a massage therapist, which I still actively practice. Technically, I’ve been coaching my whole life in these respective careers.
My clients and friends have said for years, I should get paid for this coaching I do (and I should write a book too).
I’m a natural.
I’m loving and compassionate.
I listen without judgement.
I deliver the truth with love….
Now, I’m actually certified to be called a professional. Over the years of coaching and being willing to be coached I am comfortable in my own skin. I am authentic. I’m willing to risk it all to speak the truth to help another on their journey.
In addition to all of this, I am an intuitive empath. I didn’t know or understand this for much of my life. It wasn’t spoken or encouraged growing up. Now, it is time to enlighten others and shine the light for them to find their way.
Coming full circle, today, my life is extraordinary. It is beyond anything I could have ever imagined, because I didn’t know I could dream any bigger than what I knew for my life pre-recovery. Every day it continues to expand and grow. I get to live my purpose as a healer helping others travel their road to healing and having an extraordinary life.
I get to be paid to do what I love.
I live with my husband, 4 cats and a dog.
We are blessed with one grandchild, so far.
We live on 2 acres in Lincoln, California. It is a town that is growing, yet, still has the small-town feel.
I get to be part of my community.
I am in service to my community in any way I can be.
I belong to the Lincoln Chamber of Commerce.
I get to mentor women on their road to recovery.